Last week I met with my Midwife, Candace Plohman, from The Midwifery Group on Main Street. It's abit of a drive from SFU but when I found out I was pregnant I knew I wanted her as my primary caregiver because she was the one who caught Jonas three years ago. At the time she was a student midwife but my last several visits were with her and my husband and I really liked her. So it was very cute when Jonas accompanied me to the appointment last week and was completely involved in the whole check up. He found a child's medical kit and as Candace measured and examined me, Jonas followed along with his own equipment. And then when we were to listen to the heart Jonas made sure Candace had the Doppler turned down low as he doesn't like the sound to be too loud. He also wanted to know where baby peed while inside of mom.
For the duration of my pregnancy I will be seeing Candace's two back up Midwives so I become comfortable with them in case they are with me for the birth. My appointments are now every two weeks this month and then weekly in March.
Candace gave me a questionnaire sheet about prenatal depression to check out as standard practice in this point of my pregnancy. Although I have no issues it did make me think about how quickly this birth is coming up and I have not done much preparation for it. As with most women I think the first pregnancy is much more involved as far as prep for the actual birth etc. This time around I feel like alot of the prep work is with Jonas and my organising and preparing for life after the birth. I am so happy to have another baby and this was definitely the perfect time to have another but I know its always hard to accept that for the months after baby is born I will not accomplish anything for myself and when I really do accept that (as with Jonas when he was a baby) then life with baby will be much easier and smoother. My belief is that the first 2 or so years of life really do set the stage for the rest of an individuals life. If baby learns that it can trust and be loved unconditionally then I think their walk through life can be much easier and fulfilling. Of course parenting will continue for the rest of my life, I think that the beginning is the most intense all consuming part of the whole lifetime role.
So what about preparation for the actual birth? I guess its easier this time around because I have already had a first birth and also because I have learned so much about birth through being a Doula. I am now very confident and comfortable with the whole birthing experience so I guess I am not too worried about prep. I will be giving birth at Women's Hospital because it is where Candace practices and although I loved the homebirth with Jonas, I felt a hospital birth made more sense this time around. I am hoping to take advantage of Women's big tubs that I have heard so much about and its nice to know that I can have a waterbirth if I feel like it at the time. Anyway, my mission at the moment is to kick this horrible head cold that has been coming and going for the past month (its been a really bad one) and then do some birth prep - you know kegels and stuff. Hahaha
Some video of Jonas dancing. Aside from dancing he loves mighty machines like cranes, trains, cement trucks, airplanes, big ships and on and on....
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Friday, February 5, 2010
31 Weeks
Although I still have 2 months left of this pregnancy, I have already felt my life shifting and changing in anticipation for the arrival of our little babe. I have attended my last few births this past month and although I am a little sad to have to let go of my career path for the next year, I know that when time allows, I will be working on some of my online courses. I will still have my foot in the door and aside from that I can still go to conferences and meetings with breastfeeding babe in tow.
So with this shifting and changing of life, my focus has narrowed and I am now spending more time taking care of myself and my family. Meaning I am trying to get the house organized; creating more flow in the kitchen, trying to figure out how to use this small space in the best way possible for all of us. I am looking for ways to make life a little easier with the arrival of the baby. I am finding new recipes and trying to cook more. I am enjoying all of this and I guess its called 'nesting'. One goal is to have a deep freezer filled with premade food before the birth. By being prepared my hope is to have a smooth transition with the new baby and a fun and relaxing summer!
Emotionally, I feel really good these days. I feel supported by Jordan, my friends and family. Spiritually, I feel full of life and very content - pregnancy seems to make me feel like a super person - someone doing and carrying out the most sacred process in the world. Physically, well, I am pregnant. Just like the last time I have had frequent Braxton Hicks contractions which started around month 3/4. This time around, beginning in the last week or so, the BH have become much more intense. On two occasions there has been enough soreness in the pelvic area that I am forced to stop and lay in bed for an hour or two until things have calmed down. This will only happen after a bunch of activity or exhaustion.
Jonas loves to give my belly kisses; especially first thing in the morning and then at bedtime. He mentions the baby throughout the day and will sometimes let me know what it is doing/experiencing and what it will want to do when it comes out. We have had many very interesting and powerful discussions about the baby. Jonas has come to many of my midwife appointments and really enjoys the whole process. A month ago, while driving to an appointment, Jonas let me know that the baby wouldn't be coming out until 'the waves' came and pushed it out. Interesting because I have never thought/described contractions as waves. Jonas has seen many babies being born and looked at many birth pictures so he is very comfortable with the idea of women giving birth. Sometimes he reminds me that he would like to be there when baby is born but sometimes when I ask if he would like to come he says no. But then the other day as he was working with his scissors he said that he would like to cut the cord. So we shall see. At the beginning of the pregnancy, Jordan and I both talked about what a big boy Jonas was now and that he would be a big brother soon etc..But then we saw a shift in his behaviour and he starting talking and acting like a baby at times. Of course we ignored the annoying behaviour, but realized that this way of preparing for the new baby was not working. I read somewhere that at Jonas's age (almost 3), the child is seeking independence but is also coming back to mom and dad for comfort and reassurance. Its like they know that they are no longer babies but they are much smaller than the big kids still - like they are caught in an awkward space. So now whenever Jonas wants a snuggle and reverts to acting abit babyish I will always say, 'you are always my little baby, my little Jonas'. And I think that this comforts him in a special way. And of course we try not talk about him being a big boy now - we just leave it. He, on the other hand, loves to talk about how he is growing and doing big kid stuff etc....`
So with this shifting and changing of life, my focus has narrowed and I am now spending more time taking care of myself and my family. Meaning I am trying to get the house organized; creating more flow in the kitchen, trying to figure out how to use this small space in the best way possible for all of us. I am looking for ways to make life a little easier with the arrival of the baby. I am finding new recipes and trying to cook more. I am enjoying all of this and I guess its called 'nesting'. One goal is to have a deep freezer filled with premade food before the birth. By being prepared my hope is to have a smooth transition with the new baby and a fun and relaxing summer!
Emotionally, I feel really good these days. I feel supported by Jordan, my friends and family. Spiritually, I feel full of life and very content - pregnancy seems to make me feel like a super person - someone doing and carrying out the most sacred process in the world. Physically, well, I am pregnant. Just like the last time I have had frequent Braxton Hicks contractions which started around month 3/4. This time around, beginning in the last week or so, the BH have become much more intense. On two occasions there has been enough soreness in the pelvic area that I am forced to stop and lay in bed for an hour or two until things have calmed down. This will only happen after a bunch of activity or exhaustion.
Jonas loves to give my belly kisses; especially first thing in the morning and then at bedtime. He mentions the baby throughout the day and will sometimes let me know what it is doing/experiencing and what it will want to do when it comes out. We have had many very interesting and powerful discussions about the baby. Jonas has come to many of my midwife appointments and really enjoys the whole process. A month ago, while driving to an appointment, Jonas let me know that the baby wouldn't be coming out until 'the waves' came and pushed it out. Interesting because I have never thought/described contractions as waves. Jonas has seen many babies being born and looked at many birth pictures so he is very comfortable with the idea of women giving birth. Sometimes he reminds me that he would like to be there when baby is born but sometimes when I ask if he would like to come he says no. But then the other day as he was working with his scissors he said that he would like to cut the cord. So we shall see. At the beginning of the pregnancy, Jordan and I both talked about what a big boy Jonas was now and that he would be a big brother soon etc..But then we saw a shift in his behaviour and he starting talking and acting like a baby at times. Of course we ignored the annoying behaviour, but realized that this way of preparing for the new baby was not working. I read somewhere that at Jonas's age (almost 3), the child is seeking independence but is also coming back to mom and dad for comfort and reassurance. Its like they know that they are no longer babies but they are much smaller than the big kids still - like they are caught in an awkward space. So now whenever Jonas wants a snuggle and reverts to acting abit babyish I will always say, 'you are always my little baby, my little Jonas'. And I think that this comforts him in a special way. And of course we try not talk about him being a big boy now - we just leave it. He, on the other hand, loves to talk about how he is growing and doing big kid stuff etc....`
Jonas is now at SFU's Morningside, which is the next age group. His best little girlfriend Porter is there as well as 2 other little friends from our building. I really was reminded with this small change how quickly our children grow and need change that supports their growth. Its not only their clothes and shoes - its their environment and social surroundings that need changing from time to time. I think that this helps with their ability to grow and become resilient. Resilience is so important. I loved Jonas's old daycare, SFU's Malaika, which was actually my old daycare in '79. Yet when he started at his new school, he immediately busied himself and fit right in! When I looked around at all the different activities for him to work on, I realized how stimulated he was going to be and how much he was going to learn through this type of play. There are blocks of all shapes, textures and sizes for building and all sorts of other building supplies (Jonas loves to build), there is make believe and pretend play area, an art area with lots of scissors, glue, felts etc. The centre is really set up nicely with the Reggio Emilio (sp?) style incorporated. So there is lots to do, a great playground amongst the trees and the teachers seem nice.
Aside from school 2X a week, Jonas and I have 3 days to ourselves. Normally I like to get out at least one day of the three, so we will spend half a day at Science World or the Aquarium or more recently, the local Strong Start Program. This week we went to Stanley Park and the Aquarium. Then on Thurs and Fri (today)
we had some nice sun and ended up alternating between gardening and baking/cooking all day. It was great! Jonas cut all the dead chocolate mint plants and watered all the bulb pots. He moved some dirt around and checked out some stuff with his magnifying glass. He found spiders and a ladybug. We saw Mr Squirrel and the crows and we also saw a couple of pileated woodpeckers. Of course there are always mail trucks and and other big trucks driving by which is exciting for Jonas as he pushes his own dump truck around the yard. We made cottage cheese pancakes for lunch and then went back outside where I lounged and he stayed busy. I have a feeling we will be spending a lot of time in the yard this summer! Maybe we will even get the strawberries planted this weekend!!!!
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