Our Island Vacation!

Jord and I headed out for a wedding reception (kids stayed home!) Sort of a DATE!!

Wonderful evening!!


Strathcona Park, Vancouver Island


Saratoga Beach


UBC Agricultural Land - Camping in the Comox Valley after Woodlot AGM


Karina chilling while we set up camp....


Beautiful Island!!




Cousin Livia - Jonas loves to hang out with her!


Grandpa Ken and Grandpa Jerry in Drew Harbour on Quadra Island


Jordan and Soren on Mom and Dad's boat -

4 Months

After spending a whirlwind 3 weeks vacation on the Islands, we are back and easily settled into our little routine and life. After visiting with family and friends we were all fairly exhausted yet it only took a couple days back at home before we were rejuvenated and ready to get back into a much needed routine. Jonas was very easy to get back into regular bedtimes and school/social life, but Karina seems to be a whole new and forever changing person!

Karina is very similar to Jonas as a baby in that she does not cry much nor does she fuss. I consider both Karina and Jonas very easy babies but as time goes on I can see more differences. I am enjoying these differences immensely and am having such a wonderful time getting to know our beautiful little girl. As a baby, Jonas was very content and very easy to pacify if he was upset. Being outside or breastfeeding was all that was ever needed to make Jonas a happy baby. Jonas really liked being around people and hated to play alone. He is very social and not at all shy. Karina, on the other hand is quite mellow but when she is mad, she can be a little more difficult to settle. She will not take the breast nor will going outside calm her. The only thing that I can do for her is take her into a quiet place/ dark room and hold her. She eventually settles on her own. There doesn't seem to be any specific thing for me to do that will calm her - all I can do is provide the environment for her to relax in and she does the rest. Both Jonas and Karina really only get upset is when overstimulated and tired/hungry. Karina has also mastered rolling from back to front and front to back. She is now almost beginning to scoot forward a little. She can almost sit and will often balance herself with an arm if she begins to fall over or else she just flops over. She also likes to stand on her feet with all of her weight, leaning on my arm or other object.



Karina is often not too happy to be held by other people but sometimes she will warm up to someone new who is holding her. She seems to like to be on her own and spend a lot of time observing everything around her. Karina will spend lots of time rolling around on the floor or sitting in her chair keeping herself occupied. Of course I realize that part of this self sufficiency is due to nature and also due to nurture. I am often running around doing one thing or another and cannot always be at her side. She accepts this easily most of the time and will have no problems letting me know otherwise.

I was never into baby swings, exersaucers, jolly jumpers etc for Jonas - although I borrowed all of those items and owned an exersaucer, Jonas was never really into any of them. Since then I have heard from a physiotherapist friend that these devices actually slow down an infants development if used for more than a few minutes each day. In the end I am sure that it doesn't matter either way, but I have not had any need/desire to place Karina in any of these devices. Having a tiny apartment makes it easier to not have these devices as well. Less crap laying around! The idea of kids watching movies in cars while on road trips is totally foreign to me - I am a little old fashioned in that I like Jonas to check out the scenery, listen to music, sing or have conversation with us while driving. A new activity while in the car for Jonas is listening to stories on CD. He is STOKED on listening to CARS at the moment - I don't mind at all because I look back at him and his eyes are faraway and I can tell he is imagining each scene as the story is told and I only wish I could see what the story looks like in his minds eye.




And before I fall asleep I must share one final and interesting development over the past two days. Based on strong intuition and some developmental 'cues' - I fed Karina her first food! It is abit early, but I felt that Karina was ready. While pregnant I imagined that I would wait until she was at least 6 months but I have had this nagging feeling at the back of my mind that she is ready and she seems very interested in food. SO I mixed some freshly pumped milk with some brown rice cereal and tried it out. I was not entirely surprised when Karina squealed with joy and kicked her feet excitedly after I fed her her first spoonful. I only allowed her about 3 teaspoons at her first meal. Some of the clues she has given me that she is ready is that she is almost sitting on her own, she is very interested in my food and tried to grab at it, she does not push the food out of her mouth and she opens her mouth really wide when she sees the spoon coming toward her. She has never done this with the breast, Never a big open mouth like many babies out there. Funny and unique girl, my Karina! This is significant for everyone because it means that others can now participate in feeding her, my milk supply may change (so soon??) and her poops will go from pleasant smelling to stinky real poops.

And this is my life and excitement at the moment and I wouldn't trade it for the world! Its all going by too quickly but by continuing to write in this blog, I have a record of this short time in my life with my little darlings! My mind is so fuzzy half the time and my writing is not at all my best but I will continue otherwise I may not remember these days as clearly as I would like!

Karina - 3 Months

These past 12 weeks have really flown by. But, really, there is no other way that time flows when you have a baby. A baby and a 3 year old. Lots of energy. Actually, Karina feels very easy next to her big brother. Thank goodness Jordan is around on the non daycare days; Jonas just has so much energy to burn. Long walks in the forest and sports and sand/dirt play are his all day staples when not in daycare. Naps are hard to come by for Jonas when he is at home and he will only fall asleep if we are in the car which is not very often.


Karina is also full of energy these days. She sleeps so well through the night with feedings every 3 hours, but never a full awakening. She sleeps well in her side bed next to us, but eventually I get lazy and she ends up sleeping with us after one of her feeds during the night. Daytime, Karina is a light napper and will fall asleep easily while in the Bjorn but will not stay asleep on her own unless I am snuggled with her. I only nap with her every other day because I find that I am not needing the extra sleep. My energy has been quite good since Karina was born. Some days tougher, but generally my energy is quite good. Karina naps between 3-5 times a day and this is anywhere from 15 minutes to 2 hours. She is very content to watch me in the kitchen or outside in the garden. She spends long periods on her tummy or in her chairs, looking around. When she gets a little grumpy I put her back in the Bjorn and she is content once again. At the moment, life is very simple.




Simple is good and I am thoroughly enjoying the moment. I try to get out for at least an hour of exercise 5 days a week. I am trying new recipes and making many healthy meals - our smoothies are the best ever and we have gotten super creative! I am eating a larger variety of green smoothies and also some chocolate ones lately as well.

It has felt so refreshing to start back at Bikrams Yoga again. I wish I could go more, but once a week is better than non and at this point I will take what I can get. I have tried playing squash with Jordan which was fun and again I can't wait to play again. Aside from that I have been jogging and swimming and going on lots of walks with Karina.

Living on campus is so convenient and lots of fun. Although our actual apartment building is a complete dump, our apartment is average and we have a nice yard. We are south facing so we get lots of sun, yet some shade from a giant Maple tree. We have some privacy but we do overlook the Whitecaps soccer field which is fine! Actually, all the sports facilities surrounding us are world class; its great to have so many healthy and active people all over the place. We have also made some really great friends and the overall feeling is that we all feel quite supported by one another and there is always someone close by to help in any situation. (birth, babysitting etc)

Its hard to find the time to collect my thoughts and sit down to write this blog. I often think of different things I would like to write about but when I have the chance to sit down for long enough, I forget what I want to write about and then I am too tired! Being a mom to a baby is exhausting and chaotic with a 3 year old running around. The other day it took several minutes for me to try to communicate one thought to Jordan and it was just such an insane moment with Karina in my arms and Jonas running around - I had to laugh at myself. And to top it off, I wonder if Jordan even registered what I was saying. Life at the moment can be rather crazy, but as long as I live in the moment, keep things simple and remember that this will all pass much too quickly, then I think I will pull through just fine (with Jordan and Jonas and Karina!)

Little Darlings

Aside from flying off the couch, Jonas also likes fitting in small spaces and building forts throughout the house


Karina is already pinning Jonas down!


I love these moments.....

10 Weeks

The 3 month growth spurt is probably upon us. Although Karina is 10 weeks I am very certain she is having a growth spurt. With the continual feeding last night and all day today I was actually able to peal myself out of bed by noon in order to eat and get dressed. I was actually up at 6AM this morning, which is very early in this house. No one usually gets out of bed until 7:30 - but today I got out of bed after a big Karina feed because I knew she would want me back in bed for another feed and perhaps her dad could keep her asleep a little longer with his presence next to her. I was back in bed by 9AM where I snuggled and fed Karina and drifted in and out of sleep. I swear my nipple was in her mouth the whole time...

So I had an hour to myself where I sipped coffee and blogged. It was quite nice to sit back in a quiet house and enjoy the time to myself. After having used a bodem for our coffee for years and breaking two in the month that Karina was born, we invested in a nice coffee machine. Each night I pregrind and preset the machine to 7AM, so that when Jordan rolls out of bed when Jonas wakes up, he is greeted with some nice coffee - its like a little 'I love you for getting up with Jonas' coffee. Mind you, I am usually up within half an hour of Jordan and Jonas getting out of bed.

As I type this, Karina has slept in the Baby Bjorn for the past hour. She has now woken up and is trying to have a conversation with me. I love that she is more awake and aware now. She loves, as Jonas did, babbling and smiling at me as we have a 'conversation'. So sweet. I am loving my time with my little baby girl. She will grow up too fast and I already know that.

Anxiety

Although it wasn't mandatory, I encouraged Jordan to attend a Community Forest conference over the weekend. I arranged to have my parents come over from the Island for the weekend so that I could have some help. I know that as my hormones settle and I become more used to life with two small children, I will become better adapted. I knew I would be fine on my own, but I also knew that I would be better off with a little help.

I have a certain anxiety when I am alone with both kids for several hours - mainly around bedtime. Jordan had a ball tournament one weekend which was fine because I would go out for walks with Jonas and Karina and it was quite easy. But when its bedtime and you have a crying baby and a very tired and cranky 3 year old its a tough juggle struggle. Every time I have Karina almost asleep, Jonas will make a noise or ask if I am ready to put him to bed. I have only been through this a few times but I must say I felt anxiety. I almost feel better simply admitting to this weakness in myself because I know it will pass with time.

Of course its good to work hard and be the best you can be, but I also believe it is healthy to admit ones weaknesses and shortcomings. We are humans, not superheros. I am not supermom and never will be.

As anyone who has read ethnopediatrician, Meredith Small's book, 'Our Babies, Ourselves: How Biology and Culture Shape the Way We Parent', will see that we are one of the few cultures around the world where a mother and usually a father will single handedly raise their children. Alone. This way of child rearing has never really been a practice that I instinctively felt was entirely healthy for anyone involved. Could this be a contributing factor to the overwhelming amount of Post Partum Depression in our culture. I think it is a major one. Maybe it contributes to the isolation people will feel at different times in their lives. With so much importance and expectation placed on that of the 'family', especially in this culture, you are bound to be disappointed! We are a culture who has many, many definitions of family, which, in all honesty I am often confused about. It seems as if each person has their own definition of what a family looks like. Whether its the nuclear family or ones spiritual/church family, I think it all needs to be incorporated into a larger picture of family. Community perhaps? SSince this is still a blog written firstly for my children as a record, according to mom, of their early life with us - perhaps I will eventually write another post dedicated to our picture of family!

I read Our Babies Ourselves when Jonas was a baby. I enjoyed how it gave such a wide overview of infant care practices across the world and then presented in a clear and concise manner. Small notes that what may seem to be "normal" baby care for one culture seems quite strange, even shocking or disturbing, for another.It is not a parenting book, really, but it does give affirmation for making instinctual parenting choices. It is a great book for anyone who is interested in infant care in other cultures. It is also a good book for parents needing encouragement that what they are doing is best for their baby even when society says it's not (especially for issues such as co-sleeping and baby wearing.)

My Little Girl

We seem to have settled into our little life as a family of 4. Karina is almost 9 weeks and is a very sweet and normal little babe. She eats, plays, sleeps and then does it all over again and of course in any order she sees fit. Life with child 2 is much smoother than with the first. I know what to expect and that is simply you never know how each day with a little baby will go. Maybe we will nurse all day and lay around and then eat Bunny noodles for dinner. Or maybe Karina will sleep abit more and I will be able to get lots accomplished. I take each day as it comes. Karina will typically nurse throughout the night but these nights are not so bad because I am so accustomed to them after already having been through one nursling already. I don't expect Karina to sleep through the night, though she occassionally sleeps for 4 hours straight without a nurse session. She will also sleep in the side cradle for the first part of the night and then come into bed with us. I find that I sleep much better once she is with us because she is nice and close and I feel more in tune with her. This is just how it has worked out for us. I was like this with Jonas as well. This time, however, I am making more of an effort to start the night with Karina in her own bed because she will probably move out of our bed to be with her brother sooner than her brother left our bed (at 18 months).

The only big difference between Karina and Jonas so far is that Jonas always fell asleep breastfeeding whereas Karina often does not and likes to sleep when she is ready - and on her own. With Jonas I could convince him through breastfeeding to fall asleep quickly or to go back to sleep if he woke up after a short 20 minute nap.

This time around I am also much more conscious of my body and much more driven to take good care of it. I am eating well and exercising lots with special focus on my back. I felt much weaker postpartum this time around and I knew that in order to function optimally and carry Karina around for hours a day in the sling and bjorn, I would have to strengthen my core. I need to carry her in order to get anything done and I can't be sore.

Karina smiles lots now, she laughs and babbles and has taken an interest in Mr Lion which was Jonas's first 'toy' as well.



Jonas is, as always, a ton of fun with the exception of typical 3 year old naughtiness!
Recently he said to Jordan when asked if he wanted to go to The Aquarium or Science World - 'I want to go to Science World so that I can play with things, not just look at things'. Science World has been his fave for the past 8 months.

Karina Isabel - 8 Weeks

3 Weeks Postpartum

For this baby, my parents were the first to come to help out and meet the new family member. Jordan's mom and dad were the first to meet and greet Jonas 3 years ago.

So, of course, West coast style, my parents had to wait until the day after Karina was born due to high winds and ferry cancellations. Funny how things work out because we found it nice to have that first partial day to ourselves to unpack and settle back at home. We weren't discharged from the hospital until later in the afternoon after Karina's birth. It was nice, though, because I got the chance to rest and take a few showers without worrying about cleaning up after myself.

We settled in at home and my parents arrived as we were waking up the next morning!! It was a nice surprise to have them there so early and they brought some snacks and chocolate (Easter weekend!!!) and some presents for Karina and Jonas. It was very festive and I was feeling great. I did not have much pain after the birth - just an achy back and some strong after pains around my belly and lower gut area (the uterus shrinking very quickly!).

Karina slept ALOT those first few days and I swear my parents only saw her awake a handful of times. She only really nursed every 3-5 hours, but I was not concerned as she was filling up her diapers with gusto and a postpartum Midwife appointment confirmed her weight gain.

My parents entertained Jonas and took him out and about. They made us some meals and hung out as we rested and recuperated. Our very thoughtful friends had us over for a turkey dinner and we got some great little pink sleepers etc - Thanks to the Fabien's and Ruff's! We felt very well taken care of!

My parents left after the long weekend and the next day I became so engorged! My milk had come in already but now it was coming full force and Karina could not drink it all! She was still sleeping all the time and only feeding every 3 or so hours. My nipples were beginning to get sore and I organized myself so that I was pumping a little and using ice packs and cabbage leaves. I was very diligent but I was in alot of pain and couldn't believe this was happening to second time mom! I nursed Jonas for 2.5 years and I thought there would not be any problems breastfeeding a second time. I was wrong. It was like starting all over again. teaching Karina how to latch and trying to figure out why my nipples were so sore and why Karina was making a clicking sound at each suck. I also began nursing on one breast only for 5 hours because I was overflowing! It was a really difficult 3 or 4 days and I needed to take alot of Tylenol and ibuprofen. I had abit of relief and healed slowly.

A week after Karina was born, Jordan's mom came over from the Island to help out. Having taken the week off, Jordan needed to finnish off a paper and prepare for a presentation for the following week. Janet stayed for the week and made our dinners, cleaned the house, shopped and took care of Jonas on the days he was not in school. I was feeling quite tired that week and I was still dealing with sore breasts. The timing couldn't have been better and she helped us out tremendously and all of the support we have collectively received has helped us get off on the right foot - well rested and healthy and school work successfully completed. Jordan has taken a week off and then he will get back to his thesis and also hopefully line up more research money for his PhD.

Aside from difficulties with soreness, mothering a second time has been really easy. Barely an adjustment. Jordan is totally confident and often puts Karina to sleep. Jonas has welcomed his little sister beautifully and loves to talk with her and watch her diapers being changed - he calls her milk poos 'flat poos' and really gets a kick out of her 'blowouts'. She has had all of her baths with her brother and one of us and she is very mellow and observant and seems to enjoy being with everyone while bathing.

Karina is a little more alert these days, but still prefers sleeping to anything else. Jonas liked nursing more than anything else. He fed every two hours whereas Karina can go for 4 hours without a feed. She is also able to settle easily without a huge need for sucking. Totally opposite of Jonas so this is all very new for us. Many times now, in the evening, after an alert period, she will nurse and then I will lay her beside me in our bed and we look at each other, side by side and I slowly close my eyes, blinking sometimes and watching her and she copies me until she is actually asleep! She begins to close her eyes when she thinks that I am sleeping - but if I open them abruptly then she wakes up fully.

2 Weeks Postpartum

getting used to the Bjorn again

Karina's Birth

After meeting up with my Midwife two Thursdays ago, I decided to do some Easter shopping on my way home. After some chocolate purchases I decided to pick out a little baby girl Easter sleeper. I thought, well, since I don't have a single item of baby girl clothing and since this would be a wonderful weekend to birth a baby, I might as well be prepared in case I actually have a girl. Just in case. Purchase justified, I headed home.

Wondered around the house for abit, deciding against doing any dishes and decided instead to have a nap beside Jordan as he worked away on his computer. I awoke from light sleep with the feeling that I had peed myself and quickly went to the bathroom. With all the baby pressure on my bladder I couldn't be sure what had happened. I was definitely leaking. I called Jordy and told her and she laughed and said, you know that's what women say when their water has broken, that they think its just pee. I still wasn't sure. But when I continued leaking I figured something was up and told Jordan. I told him that he needed to finnish up his work and wrap it up for the weekend because my water had probably broken and a baby might be coming this weekend!

About an hour later it was 5pm and I asked Jordan to do the dishes (I still hadn't done them and they had piled up that day) because my contractions had started and I needed to focus on getting some last minute stuff together. So far the contractions had only just started and they were 6-7 minutes apart at 30-45 seconds long. I called my Midwife to let her know that things had begun to move and that I was beginning labour. Jordan picked up Jonas from school and we all hung out together on the couch and decided to stay at home until my contractions became more uncomfortable. Jordan picked up a couple of rib dinners and we all ate dinner and I told Jonas that the baby had decided that it was ready to come and that soon we would be heading to Soren and Andrea's house so that we could be close to the hospital.

I kept busy between contractions because I felt really restless - so I packed a bag for Jonas and straightened out my room and we slowly made our way to the car. I think we made it to Soren's place by 9pm. I was quite relaxed and for each contraction I just leaned against the ball or the wall and tried to relax my body as much as possible during the contraction. Not always possible during the entire 45 seconds but definitely for part of them. I decided to retreat into the bedroom for abit because I was beginning to feel a little distracted by Jonas, Jordan and Soren. I got on the phone with my sister and chatted for awhile. For each contraction I needed to put the phone down and focus. Soon the time came when I was no longer comfortable talking on the phone and my contractions were beginning to feel much more intense. I hadn't been doing much timing - I was going more on intuition for this labour. I said goodbye to Ashleigh and went and had a contraction in the bathroom. At this point they were getting big and I needed Jordan now. I figured we could be together in the bathroom for abit and he could massage me and maybe I would even have a shower. Soren played with Jonas and Jordan joined me. But within a couple of contractions Jordan figured it was time to call the Midwife and start moving along to the hospital. I was a little shocked that everything had moved so quickly but agreed to make the call. I was beginning to shake and my legs were beginning to bend alot during each contraction. Candace was already at the hospital so she asked us to meet her there. WIthin a few minutes we were in admitting at Women's Hospital and if you can believe it, all the beds were full. The usual hospital policy is to go through admitting where a nurse or your Midwife will check you dilation - they do not want women in early labour using up the beds in labour and delivery. It was fairly obvious that I was in deep labour and I was even squatting a little so after checking my blood pressure, Candace convinced whoever is in charge to let me through. I was in a completely different world but knew enough about what was going on around me to kind of laugh (in my mind) and think 'is this for freaking real?? what a crazy thing to be in such labour and have to go through admitting - I felt sorry for all those first time mothers in admitting and not officially dilated enough to get a bed!' ugh. I can see how this situation could close up your cervix and slow your labour for many women - especially those who have a random nurse checking them and their doctor is nowhere to be seen. At least it is more comfortable with your midwife whom you know and have a trusting relationship with!

Luckily we were assigned to one of the nicer labour and delivery rooms and Candace wheeled me away and what I remember is how nice the wind felt on my face - we were moving fast. Everything from this point on moved at lightning speed, as I was told later. Karina was born an hour after we arrived at the hospital!

Being in my own world, I completely fell into myself. Its so hard to explain but its the most amazing state to be in. I was just body and spirit. There was no fear, I felt completely safe. I felt joy. I let my body do what it needed to move that baby down and out.

I was 5 cms dilated and that was the first and only time Candace checked me. Jordan was right at my side as contractions came closer together and Jordy (my friend and Doula) arrived minutes after we were settled. I think she got me some water as I knew I was a little dehydrated. I was also given an IV in case I needed oxytocin if I were to have another bleed like I did after Jonas was born.

Soon I had a huge puke that seems to happen to many women in transition (the last few cms of dilation are usually the most intense part of labour). After the huge puke, I remember Candace saying - I bet she's fully dilated after that! Well, soon after I felt the urge to push and 15 minutes later Karina was born! I went from pushing sideways on the bed to being on all fours because the heart rate had been lost (I think) and there was the need to quickly find it again. So out my baby came and she was swiftly brought to me between my legs where I looked down, moved the umbilical cord out of the way and declared that it was a girl! What an amazing moment! I turned around and held her to my belly and watched her in awe. She watched me and all was good. The umbilical cord was left unclamped as I had requested and we just stayed in the moment. A while later my placenta had not delivered and I had a bleed which was quickly brought under control with an IV of oxytocin. The OB came to coax the placenta out and all was good. Jordy took many many photos (thanks girl!), Jordan held Karina and snuggled her into his bare chest and much later we had her weighed and checked. She was perfect and had her first meal a couple of hours after birth.

1 Week

Karina

Jonas holds Karina, 3 days old




Our wonderful Midwife, Candace Plohman, checking on 2 day old Karina


Bonding with Dad soon after birth


Baby Karina, Born at 11:45 PM, April 1, 2010
7lbs13oz

Blessed!

No, the little one isn't here yet, but I am feeling a little blessed to have this day to myslef. Jonas got over his fever within 3 days and neither Jordan or I got any sickness. Jonas missed daycare on Monday and Tuesday while he recouperated. Wednesday found us at the library and doing some gardening in the yard. By the evening Jonas was getting more and more difficult and this is always the part of Jonas and sickness that I hate. The aftermath. While he is sick he is a little angel, but when he is finally better he becomes clingy for me, demanding, whiney and overall there can be quite a few tears throughout the day. I was exhausted by the evening and Jordan put Jonas to bed. This morning I called his school and asked if there was an opening for him and yes there was! I felt blessed and I really felt like I needed today to just rest and take care of some things before the long weekend. This also gives Jordan a chance to work on some research and really get ahead today because I am not too sure how this weekend will turn out. haha.

I met with my midwife today and all is well and ready to go. The little one is at -1 in my pelvis. A little lower than I had thought originally since I am definitely feeling more discomfort and sensitivity in my ribs than in my pelvis. Baby must be long because I never felt these sensations in my ribs with Jonas. Sometimes I feel like the baby will birth through my solar plexis than my vagina!

Mostly Bad Sleeps...

For the first pregnancy you are told that the frequent night wakings to empty your bladder helps to prepare you for frequent night feedings after the baby arrives. This time around I find myself getting frustrated on the bad nights. We go to bed, read, Jord falls asleep nice and easy. I read more, get that horrible restlessness in my legs and head out to the family room where I will do some stretches. listen to relaxing music, have a snack, stretch some more and eventually by around 3AM I am ready for real sleep. A couple of times in the past week I actually took some gravel by 2AM because I knew that I NEEDED to sleep. The last thing I need right now is to go into labour while exhausted from sleep deprivation. And the frustrating part is that I get tired because of my body and not because of having a 3 year old or because of work.....its because my body is not letting me sleep! And then after I fall asleep I am up for bathroom trips at least 3 times before 7:30AM BooHoo! But hey, its my blog and I will cry if I want to. The rib pain is prety inense as well. Never had rib issues with Jonas. Must be a bigger baby in there.

Friday, I had my weekly prelabour acupuncture. It was my third session in three weeks. For the first time the needles created some very strong sensations throughout my body and especially when they were first inserted and later when they were stimulated. Bronwynn said that this is a normal reaction when the mother is getting close to labour. I went for a peaceful walk around campus that afternoon and then climbed lots of stairs because I was feeling so good. But then of course the next morning (Sat) I was sore in the pelvis. I kind of expected that, though, because it seems like I am always a little sore in the pelvis the day after acupuncture. I noticed last week that by the evening of my acupuncture, the baby had dropped a ton and I have not had any acid indigestion since. yay.

So Saturday started off very sore, but I went with Jonas and Jordan to gymnastics in New Westminster and then a walk in Queens Park. By the time we got home the pelvis was still sore so I rested and we decided to invite some friends over for a barbecue. I didn't know if I would be able to stay awake and join everyone but by the time people arrived I was beginning to feel better and my mind was able to be occupied by other things other than my aching body. It ended up being a very good idea.

Unfortunatly, I foud out a few hours before diiner that my friend (and back up Doula) down the hall, Jordanne, and her husband and two kids had become very sick, very fast with the stomach flu. Jonas is close with her girls and had been at school with Porter the day before. So I hoped for the best with us getting sick as well. But by the time our guests left and I was putting Jonas to sleep, he had a definite fever. He was happy and had been energetic all evening (trying to get everyone to check out his 'dedroom') But he was hit with a fever and again this morning he awoke with a fever and a cough. So far no stomach issues. Also, Jordy had to call in another back up Doula for a client that was giving birth while she and her family were sick. Too bad.

Today was spent on the fold out couch, resting, reading and watching cartoons. Too rainy for a stroller walk with the sick little guy. We took a trip to the store and bought some yummy sick treats like grapes, strawberries, waffles and orangess and are now relaxing again on the fold out couch.

I am telling myself that I will remain healthy and not get this sickness. I had been thinking that tomorrows full moon would be a nice time to begin labour but now I am hoping baby waits a few more days until its big bro is feeling better. Afterall Jonas is still super keen to be around for the birth and helping to cut the cord. Either way things will work out how they are meant to be....

38 Weeks

I am ready and waiting. I've done everything I need to do to prepare for this new baby. The head is halfway down my pelvis and I am drawing my focus inward. I actually did a visualisation of the birth the other day - not what would be the perfect birth, but more the stages of labour and the sensations my body would go through as it worked with the baby to bring it down, open the cervix, release more great hormones and finally ease the baby out. It was simple. It made me smile. I think going into labour is always a surprise. With Jonas I wasn't expecting it when it started at 39 weeks and once I realized what was going on I was so giddy with excitement! This time around I am finding that I am really looking for signs of labour and wondering each day if this is the day that we will all meet the new baby.

I met with one of the back up Midwives today for my weekly visit. I did some complaining of my soreness and told her that I don't ever remember being this uncomfortable in the pelvis for the first pregnancy. I am also having alot of rib pain which was never an issue with Jonas. In all honesty I am sore and tired. My body is beginning to feel depleted. But then some days I wake up with lots of energy. Its like a physical rollercoster rather than an emotional rollercoaster. My one main hope is that I am as well rested for this birth as I was with Jonas'.

Through some bloodwork I have learned that I am now iron deficient and my ferratin levels are getting low. Maybe that is the reason for the increased fatigue and low moods these past few days. Funny about the iron because I have been craving my old green smoothies lately and have begun to blend and freeze batches of spinach, kale and parsley to make easy smoothies after the baby comes. I also made some energy balls with Jonas tonight (almond butter, agave, goji berries, cherries, sunflower seeds etc).

So tonight my feelings are that I am ready and waiting. Excited to meet the baby. Looking forward to moving about freely, running, chasing Jonas, hot yoga and everything else I can't physically do at the moment.

38 Weeks

Playtime!

36 Weeks

Last week Jonas and I returned home after spending 9 days on the Island. It was very refreshing to be back home and I got a few opportunities to rest and enjoy some massage/cranial sacral sessions. It was great to catch up with everyone and also celebrate Jonas' 3rd birthday with family. We ended up having two different cakes/parties while on the Island and then another cake/party with his LRH friends. I hope Jonas doesn't expect to have 3 parties everytime he has a birthday!

I have felt much stronger and healthier over these past 3 weeks than I had for the previous month. With those two back to back colds I had, I almost felt like I would go into labour early because of my exhaustion. Yet after a visit with my Naturopath and following through with several of her suggestions and treatments, I am feeling great these days.

The baby has been in the same position for as long as I can remember. Kicks on the left side, back on the right side. The head has been engaged for a few weeks now, so I am hoping that it is in the best position possible for both my pelvis and the big exit. Hiccups are common throughout the day and as always the Braxton Hicks are on top of each other. I am now becoming abit swollen in the hands and feet and still suffer from some restless leg at night. My pelvis is often sore and feels very loose and expanded. I usually stop to rest because of pain here and there and not because of fatigue. My energy is great and I just went through several days of extreme nesting. I was never like this with Jonas - maybe abit of nesting, but this time I am an organized freak. Everything is ready to go, including my hospital bag. It could still be another month until labour, but I just felt a very strong need to get everything ready. I do not want to be surprised with labour. I just want to be ready for when the baby decides to make its way out. I am so excited to begin this labour and am so anxious to meet the little baby that has already become a big part of our family. I think I will have to dedicate a whole post to Jonas's excitement about the baby. I didn't think he would be so interested and involved with the baby before it has even arrived, but he is absolutely fascinated. I guess my bulging belly also helps to remind him all the time of the baby growing inside.

Indeed this 2nd pregnancy has been very similar to my first one and yet it is so different on so many levels. I have loved and enjoyed them both so much and have really appreciated the differences and uniquness of both pregnancy experiences. Of course each pregnancy seems to have presented different difficulties and adjustments - there have been difficult times during each and I also expect that after this birth everything will be entirely different again compared to when Jonas was a newborn, I am looking forward to the birth but I am also resting and enjoying the moment.



36 weeks...

32 Weeks

Last week I met with my Midwife, Candace Plohman, from The Midwifery Group on Main Street. It's abit of a drive from SFU but when I found out I was pregnant I knew I wanted her as my primary caregiver because she was the one who caught Jonas three years ago. At the time she was a student midwife but my last several visits were with her and my husband and I really liked her. So it was very cute when Jonas accompanied me to the appointment last week and was completely involved in the whole check up. He found a child's medical kit and as Candace measured and examined me, Jonas followed along with his own equipment. And then when we were to listen to the heart Jonas made sure Candace had the Doppler turned down low as he doesn't like the sound to be too loud. He also wanted to know where baby peed while inside of mom.

For the duration of my pregnancy I will be seeing Candace's two back up Midwives so I become comfortable with them in case they are with me for the birth. My appointments are now every two weeks this month and then weekly in March.

Candace gave me a questionnaire sheet about prenatal depression to check out as standard practice in this point of my pregnancy. Although I have no issues it did make me think about how quickly this birth is coming up and I have not done much preparation for it. As with most women I think the first pregnancy is much more involved as far as prep for the actual birth etc. This time around I feel like alot of the prep work is with Jonas and my organising and preparing for life after the birth. I am so happy to have another baby and this was definitely the perfect time to have another but I know its always hard to accept that for the months after baby is born I will not accomplish anything for myself and when I really do accept that (as with Jonas when he was a baby) then life with baby will be much easier and smoother. My belief is that the first 2 or so years of life really do set the stage for the rest of an individuals life. If baby learns that it can trust and be loved unconditionally then I think their walk through life can be much easier and fulfilling. Of course parenting will continue for the rest of my life, I think that the beginning is the most intense all consuming part of the whole lifetime role.

So what about preparation for the actual birth? I guess its easier this time around because I have already had a first birth and also because I have learned so much about birth through being a Doula. I am now very confident and comfortable with the whole birthing experience so I guess I am not too worried about prep. I will be giving birth at Women's Hospital because it is where Candace practices and although I loved the homebirth with Jonas, I felt a hospital birth made more sense this time around. I am hoping to take advantage of Women's big tubs that I have heard so much about and its nice to know that I can have a waterbirth if I feel like it at the time. Anyway, my mission at the moment is to kick this horrible head cold that has been coming and going for the past month (its been a really bad one) and then do some birth prep - you know kegels and stuff. Hahaha

Some video of Jonas dancing. Aside from dancing he loves mighty machines like cranes, trains, cement trucks, airplanes, big ships and on and on....

31 Weeks

Although I still have 2 months left of this pregnancy, I have already felt my life shifting and changing in anticipation for the arrival of our little babe. I have attended my last few births this past month and although I am a little sad to have to let go of my career path for the next year, I know that when time allows, I will be working on some of my online courses. I will still have my foot in the door and aside from that I can still go to conferences and meetings with breastfeeding babe in tow.

So with this shifting and changing of life, my focus has narrowed and I am now spending more time taking care of myself and my family. Meaning I am trying to get the house organized; creating more flow in the kitchen, trying to figure out how to use this small space in the best way possible for all of us. I am looking for ways to make life a little easier with the arrival of the baby. I am finding new recipes and trying to cook more. I am enjoying all of this and I guess its called 'nesting'. One goal is to have a deep freezer filled with premade food before the birth. By being prepared my hope is to have a smooth transition with the new baby and a fun and relaxing summer!

Emotionally, I feel really good these days. I feel supported by Jordan, my friends and family. Spiritually, I feel full of life and very content - pregnancy seems to make me feel like a super person - someone doing and carrying out the most sacred process in the world. Physically, well, I am pregnant. Just like the last time I have had frequent Braxton Hicks contractions which started around month 3/4. This time around, beginning in the last week or so, the BH have become much more intense. On two occasions there has been enough soreness in the pelvic area that I am forced to stop and lay in bed for an hour or two until things have calmed down. This will only happen after a bunch of activity or exhaustion.

Jonas loves to give my belly kisses; especially first thing in the morning and then at bedtime. He mentions the baby throughout the day and will sometimes let me know what it is doing/experiencing and what it will want to do when it comes out. We have had many very interesting and powerful discussions about the baby. Jonas has come to many of my midwife appointments and really enjoys the whole process. A month ago, while driving to an appointment, Jonas let me know that the baby wouldn't be coming out until 'the waves' came and pushed it out. Interesting because I have never thought/described contractions as waves. Jonas has seen many babies being born and looked at many birth pictures so he is very comfortable with the idea of women giving birth. Sometimes he reminds me that he would like to be there when baby is born but sometimes when I ask if he would like to come he says no. But then the other day as he was working with his scissors he said that he would like to cut the cord. So we shall see. At the beginning of the pregnancy, Jordan and I both talked about what a big boy Jonas was now and that he would be a big brother soon etc..But then we saw a shift in his behaviour and he starting talking and acting like a baby at times. Of course we ignored the annoying behaviour, but realized that this way of preparing for the new baby was not working. I read somewhere that at Jonas's age (almost 3), the child is seeking independence but is also coming back to mom and dad for comfort and reassurance. Its like they know that they are no longer babies but they are much smaller than the big kids still - like they are caught in an awkward space. So now whenever Jonas wants a snuggle and reverts to acting abit babyish I will always say, 'you are always my little baby, my little Jonas'. And I think that this comforts him in a special way. And of course we try not talk about him being a big boy now - we just leave it. He, on the other hand, loves to talk about how he is growing and doing big kid stuff etc....`

Jonas is now at SFU's Morningside, which is the next age group. His best little girlfriend Porter is there as well as 2 other little friends from our building. I really was reminded with this small change how quickly our children grow and need change that supports their growth. Its not only their clothes and shoes - its their environment and social surroundings that need changing from time to time. I think that this helps with their ability to grow and become resilient. Resilience is so important. I loved Jonas's old daycare, SFU's Malaika, which was actually my old daycare in '79. Yet when he started at his new school, he immediately busied himself and fit right in! When I looked around at all the different activities for him to work on, I realized how stimulated he was going to be and how much he was going to learn through this type of play. There are blocks of all shapes, textures and sizes for building and all sorts of other building supplies (Jonas loves to build), there is make believe and pretend play area, an art area with lots of scissors, glue, felts etc. The centre is really set up nicely with the Reggio Emilio (sp?) style incorporated. So there is lots to do, a great playground amongst the trees and the teachers seem nice.

Aside from school 2X a week, Jonas and I have 3 days to ourselves. Normally I like to get out at least one day of the three, so we will spend half a day at Science World or the Aquarium or more recently, the local Strong Start Program. This week we went to Stanley Park and the Aquarium. Then on Thurs and Fri (today)

 we had some nice sun and ended up alternating between gardening and baking/cooking all day. It was great! Jonas cut all the dead chocolate mint plants and watered all the bulb pots. He moved some dirt around and checked out some stuff with his magnifying glass. He found spiders and a ladybug. We saw Mr Squirrel and the crows and we also saw a couple of pileated woodpeckers. Of course there are always mail trucks and and other big trucks driving by which is exciting for Jonas as he pushes his own dump truck around the yard. We made cottage cheese pancakes for lunch and then went back outside where I lounged and he stayed busy. I have a feeling we will be spending a lot of time in the yard this summer! Maybe we will even get the strawberries planted this weekend!!!!